le sigh

Looking for library jobs is quite an annoying and tedious process, especially when one really wants to be lazy and cheap by finding lodging at their parents' house...

True story.

I am very much over library school.

A term paper by any other name...

...will still be annoying to write whether it is being turned in to a professor at the School of Communication, Information and Library Studies or the newly proposed name change School of Communication and Information. Fortunately, the application for my degree I filled out earlier in the week shows that regardless of what the board of governors actually decides upon, I will be a SCILS graduate, not an SCI graduate.

Let me back up a bit and give a brief summary of what the heck is going on. If you're in New Jersey or conversant with Rutgers happenings, then you may please allow your attention to wander down to the next paragraph. For the rest of you, here's what you need to know: Brandy new to the job, SCILS Dean Jorge Reina Schement decided to further the school's emphasis on communications while repeatedly shafting their largest program, library science. The dean argues that the change to SCI away from SCILS will provide a more cohesive unity in the represented schools and ease confusion many outsiders face upon hearing School of Communication, Information and Library Studies.

Excuse me? How does that even make sense? Previous to knowing anything about library science I knew SCILS had a library program. Why? The name told me so. It's that simple. Now that I am only too-versed in library theory I can understand the correlation between libraries and information as a brand, but to the common public? I can imagine it now...

"Hey you wanna give us some money? We need help with library advocacy blah blah blah. Oh you will!? Fabulous! Make that check out to the School of Communication and Information. No... I'm not trying to scam you into giving money for communications and IT, it's our name. ... Yes I know it doesn't say library but I swear to you we teach library ish. For real! We've got the best program in school libraries. Or we did, now we're like number 5 because everyone forgets about us now that we aren't technically a library school. ... No! No! That's not what I meant! We ARE a library school but we're losing street cred because the word library isn't in our name anymore. [sigh] I can send you the FAQ brochure explaining this and other inane decisions made by the powers that be."

Here's what other folks are saying:

• Library Journal
• NJSLA
• right from the horse's mouth
• that grammatically autrocious school paper that convinced me to enter this stupid profession in the first place: The Targum

Sometimes I just don't understand you, Cassie

If you weren't already aware of this fact, I'm a giant dork. The type of dork that likes to reread Animorphs because they are amazing and can turn into animals at will. Hot damn, I wish I could become a giraffe any time I wanted. Chill out, eat some leaves from the top of the tree (because, theoretically, I can eat leaves from the bottom now if I really wanted), the usche.

In reading Animorphs #14, The Unknown, I stumbled upon this quote:

"You ready?" Rachel asked.

"Just have to check on this opossum's bandage. Good. The stitches are holding. Good boy," I said to the opossum with the mangled paw. Okay. Now I'm ready."

"Why do they have that extra o in opossum?" Marco wondered. "What's the point of it if it's silent?"

Why indeed, Marco, why indeed? What I think you meant to ask, was why on earth are you trying to save an opossum in the first place? If it had opposable thumbs, it would knife you. My friend Cara is an expert on the subject and has confirmed that given the chance, an opossum would slit your throat. I mean, just look at them:

He is not thanking you for fixing his bandages, Cassie. For all you know, that opossum is the one that passes on the genetic ability to grow opposable thumbs. Your silly war with the Yeerks will look foolish if in the end we were all enslaved by knife-wielding opossoms, wouldn't it? Take your overalls and poop-covered boots and get over your animal-friendly self.

This post is dedicated to Cara, for her perseverance against opossums. Stay strong, sister, stay strong.

Please note...

My computer (you know, the thing that was rumored to be fixed by now) is dead as a doorknob still. Just wanted to keep you in the loop. I'm looking into getting a Mac, because I am so over the cruddiness that is PC. Anyway, that should be this weekend. Yay! After I finish all the homework that is due this weekend (oh, who am I kidding? Probably instead of doing my homework...), I'll post some of the Throwback Reviews I've got brewing. I have 4 (count 'em FOUR) old school reads checked out and I'm halfway through the stack. To commemorate my new computer, I will post a Throwback Review everyday for a week. Every. Day. It's like your birthday, but better.

Craptastic Idea

A rolling research library seems like a good idea in theory. That is, until you realize that the librarians of the collection are the student council and volunteer teachers. Students and teachers that are expected to:

• Select materials
• Catalog
  
• Maintain the collection

Excuse me? First of all, isn't cataloging annoying, tedious and tends to be complicated in the rules department? I'm pretty sure I remember having at least one nervous breakdown during my cataloging course (but then again, that could be a result of the teaching style). Either way, cataloging is an area of librarianship that many seek excessive distance, so how would students be experienced enough in their short 13 years to do it?

This library is an enormous blow to school librarians in the state of New Jersey. If the department of education for NJ did not make such stringent guidelines for which classes I am required to take in order to be a media specialist, I would imagine them unaware of what it takes to be an effective school librarian, but they did. They are aware of the education process that churns out librarians, and yet they anticipate teachers and children to be able to do our job? Excuse me, what?

For reals?

Now, I am all about turning popular movies and children's shows into picture books/early readers and the like, but come on. According to the Slate.com slide-show I snagged from Mo Willem's blog, movies such as The Incredible Hulk, Ironman and The Dark Knight are being turned into early readers. Early readers!!!?!?! In case you haven't heard of these movies because of that huge rock on top of your body that you call home, please feel free to visit the IMDB pages I supplied on each of those movies up there. As you can see, these movies are PG-13. In fact, The Dark Knight traumatized me so much, I refuse to accept that it is rated anything below NC-17. How are you going to turn around and make a children's book about these movies?! An EARLY READER at that. I beg you! Kids are not so oblivious that they don't see the television commercials for these movies. Even if they do not have TV, the posters, action figures and various other advertisements are going to entice them to go further than reading these "kid friendly" books.

In a slightly less incredulous note, the slide-show is both educational (boo, hiss) and enjoyable and totally worth checking out.

Summertime Computer Blues

I've decided I'm really ready for summer to be over. Here's why:

1. The children go back to school and there is some level of composed calm at the library.
2. I miss seeing my friends on a frequent basis.
   
3. My empty house is creeping me out beyond belief. Can people move in yet?
4. I'll be able to get breaks at work again instead of this conduct-a-program-then-immediately-start-reporting nonsense.
5. It will be time to stop delaying the inevitable and bring my computer down to the Geek Squad (or something like it) to fix it if they can. If not, I can sweep up one of those fancy back to school deals on a new computer.
   

Which brings me to this post's title. I am thoroughly missing having access to the Internet outside of work. Yeah, I can check my emails and whatnot, but that's not all I like to do. I like being able to boot up the computer and ponder a quick little blog post for your delight and rapture (see also: the fact that I've only composed about 3 posts this summer). I like being able to check Facebook and not worry if a supervisor is right around the corner. What's weird is, I miss Facebook applications. Who is obsessed with Facebook enough that they're sad they can't look through electronic buttons on Flair? For reals here people, my computer needs to get taken care of seven yesterdays ago.

Goodness gracious great balls of dear god make it stop.

I seem to be complaining a bit too much about how boring library school is. But in all honesty, we're librarians! For crying out loud, way to live up to the stereotype! Things I would rather be doing instead of building number charts for Dewey numbers: oh, I don't know, anything? And to think this is the most fun I've had in cataloging all semester...

In other news, I have a quote for you on this lovely Pottertastic Tuesday:

"Tell me one last thing," said Harry. "Is this real? Or has this been happening inside my head?"

Dumbledore beamed at him, and his voice sounded loud and strong in Harry's ears even though the bright mist was descending again, obscuring his figure.

"Of course it is happening inside your head, Harry, but why on earth should that mean it is not real?"

::Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows::King's Cross::(723)

Life sucks when you don't have the Internet

Here is a list of things I missed as a result of my laptop charger breaking:

• My sanity. Three hours of reference class is just plain torture without simplistic video games to divert my didn't-the-book-already-say-that-exact-same-thing-but-more-concisely frustration.
• JKR/WB v. RDR/SVA trial updates. Apparently the trial is over? I can't really find a conclusive set of facts about the outcome other than a partial settlement agreement. Perhaps it's out there but...
• I have lots of backed up homework to do.
• Daniel Radcliffe's made-for-TV movie, My Boy Jack aired this Sunday. Finding this out on Tuesday helps me a lot.

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

Okay. We all know about the Harry Potter copyright lawsuit going on right now, at least you are if you are familiar with my blog. Rowling took the stand today and everyone is all a flutter reiterating what she had to say. The BBC followed the case, and reported the following sad news:

"The author said she is not sure if she now has 'the will or the heart' to write her own definitive encyclopaedia, the proceeds of which she had intended to donate to charity."

OMG--NOOO!!!!

Jo, you can't do that!!! I don't care what it takes, you hire more lawyers and hitmen or WHATEVER to snuff this cruddy Lexicon version into the ground like a dead leaf on the playground, but YOU DO IT. Please have the heart because we ARE ALL BEHIND YOU. Your fans support you, lady! If this court case somehow does end up in RDR's favor, we can organize a massive boycott if it means you will publish your last volume. It is the only thing that kept me out of the therapist's office after you ended Harry Potter was the promise of an encyclopedia with hidden bits of knowledge heretofore unknown. I mean, first you tease us with those rare fairy tales and now you might give up because some guy that made himself famous off your creativity? I don't know if I can go on. : (

Wipe-out!

I am beat. I was planning on detailing my first day at my new public library job but it kicked my butt. It probably doesn't help that I had to wake up uber early and then get back from class around ten PM after reliving the worst day of my life via storytime only to still have more homework. If that run-on sentence wasn't an indication of how swamped with grogginess I am right now, I don't know what is.

To conclude this whiny rant, I will either post tomorrow about my first two days or wait until after Friday to report my first week. One or the other, but probably the latter.

Enviro-Nazi Strikes Again...

Excessive paper usage is a personal pet peeve. If there is no reason to put something on paper, don't do it. It's that simple. I blog now, instead of keeping a journal. My notebook is Microsoft, instead of Five Star. And yet, some people just want to print things to print them--even if it's grossly unnecessary. That's cool I guess if that's what you're into, but don't make me do it (and for the record, the italics mean it's totally not cool one iota). My reference professor is of the opinion that because our class isn't entirely paperless, it's quite all right to print out things for no reason. Let's see if you follow her logic:

• We are to look at two online or print biographical sources for next week and look up some individuals
• If we look at print versions, we must copy them and bring them to class (understandable as far as discussions are concerned)
• If we look at online sources, we are to print out the web page.
  
• Even if we use our laptops in class
• No, she's not collecting it

What the? I questioned her on these last two bullet points to confirm that yes, she really does want us to print things for no reason. Why is that? Because she couldn't give me a reason for printing them. But we have to do it. I mean, if it were one page, fine. But two sources worth of information, PLUS our notes?

So, in light of the painfully environmentally UNfriendly decision of my professor, I've decided to do a throwback review. This book (and perhaps Dawn from the Baby-Sitter's Club) might explain why I am such an Enviro-Nazi, considering how prevalently I read these books as a youngin'.

A little while back, I recounted the very first book in the Animorph book series. After remembering how awesome the Animorphs are, I decided to reread the entire series (since I'm a huge-mega dork). Anyway, the fourth title of the series, The Message, is intriguing. It's told from Cassie's perspective and begins with strange dreams she's been having. When she tells her friends about them, it turns out that Tobias, her red-tailed hawk buddy's been having them too! Gasp!

When a news report indicates that something washed up on the beach, something that looks an awful lot like a piece of an Andalite ship, the Animorph gang realizes they're gonna have to go to the ocean and find out. Deep at the bottom of the ocean is a stranded Andalite (who, incidentally, was sending messages to any Andalites that may be on Earth to save him, which explains those pesky dreams Tobias and Cassie were having) who tells the Animorphs the real reason the Yeerk-Jerks are enslaving the human race, and it ain't pretty. Not only are they after a race of intelligent beings to control, but they also want to eradicate superfluous lifeforms on Earth. Now the Animorphs realize that they aren't just fighting to save the human race, but all creatures and animals of Earth.

And the dictionary's dead depressing...

What's that you say? Kristi(e) came down with a case of dictionary depression? How can that be?

I'll tell you how. The Oxford English Dictionary, the very same book that cataloged the history of our enriching and ever-changing language, has failed me. I don't know if the sky is up or just an elaborate ruse devised by clever monkeys and vengeful birds. I couldn't tell you if Syd Barrett really was crazy, or just an elaborate story created by musicians with too much time on their hands. And you know what else I couldn't tell you? The meaning of the word embololalia after consulting the OED. That's right, not even the online version that fetches Rutgers a pretty penny. How can this be? The free version of Merriam-Webster was able to define it, so why not the esteemed Oxford English Dictionary? My world is crumbling in front of my very eyes. A better question, perhaps, is why can the OED define McJob, yet fails to enrich the lives of word enthusiasts all over with a genuinely delightful word?

Without further anticipation, I present to you, embololalia:

Pronunciation: ,em-bə-lō-'lā-lē-ə, -'lal-ē-
Function: noun
: the interpolation of meaningless sounds or words into speech

What the?

I walked away from my desk for one minute and someone stole my pen. Vultures. If you ever find yourself at a library and the librarian/information assistant is turning their head, clearly pens are fair game. Jerks.

Recap Attack

Instead of writing a bunch of posts, today I'm just gonna fashion myself a bulleted list and pretend that I'm as organized as a librarian should be.

• Reference is getting annoying. First off, I work at a desk in an academic library. And now, while I'm A) crappy at it and B) not everyone in the class has that luxury, I still can figure out basic things on my own, without a ten minute lesson on how to search databases. When Paulette said she was going to go over something we all should know how to use from the site, I was imagining her busting out the reference resources--because those suckers are intense and I tend to stay away from them even though they are ah-mazing. No. Of course that is too advanced. Instead, let's ask questions about how to find articles. Are you kidding me? Are you effing kidding me? Thank god for blogs and laptops, because otherwise I wouldn't know what to do with myself during class.
  
  
• Last night was the YA author panel in the faculty lounge at SCILS. It was quite snazz-tastic. The featured authors were Bob Krech, Eireann Corrigan and Megan Mccafferty. It was definitely worth the late visit to SCILS and a great learning experience. I was pleasantly surprised that 2 of the panelists worked as teachers in addition to writing books; it gives me hope for the future. One of my biggest fears is that I'll finally get a real job at a school and never have time during the week to do something other than lesson-planning like my friend Dana, let alone write. So, phew, you can be a teacher and a wonderful writer. Excellent. Although, I can't personally say that I've read the books, so I am going on everyone else's words that they are awesome. I guess I will have to shelve my juvenille-fiction-only mentality to read their works. They all were such fun and interesting people that their books can't help but be good, right? Right. Plug time, so you can all read them with me:
• Megan Mccafferty's Fourth Comings(but it would probably be better to read the first three books beforehand)
• Bob Krech's Rebound
• Eireann Corrigan's Ordinary Ghosts
• Bonus: Eireann Corrigan's Splintering (because that just sounds interesting as hell)
  
  
• There is no logical leap for this, so I'll just put this out there. I miss the Secret World of Alex Mack. Badly. I yearn to watch a girl turn into silvery goo while wearing striped shirts from Sears and overalls. What a great premise. Her dad works at a radioactive chemical plant, and Alex, being in the wrong place at the wrong time (which is obviously the best formula for preteen mishap) gets doused in chemicals and BAM she can turn into liquid and squirt herself into all sorts of tiny nooks and crevices. Oh, and her father's plant is lurking and looming, looking all about for her. But oh snap, she just oozes out of all sorts of tight spaces. Sigh. I miss that being on TV all the time. Those were the days. In fact, I was grounded from TV so much that I ended up buying the books, because I need a Mack attack that badly.
  

Death of Dewey?

This just in (okay, not really... this article was published in July):

According to a post on The Chronicle of Higher Education, there are a select few public libraries in Arizona forgoing the traditional Dewey Decimal system. And while the comments are littered with several librarians whose reactions might suggest that such a move is blasphemy, there are a few points in support of it.

The article argues from an academic standpoint, which is understandable when considering the source, but the libraries in question are public libraries. Personally, I think it might be a good move, depending on the patrons. One of the comments suggested that better library instruction is called for, not an overhaul of the entire classification system. That is just plain silly. Anyone familiar with CISSL or the campaign for school libraries led by names like Carol Kuhlthau and Ross Todd would know that we are already attempting better instruction. Despite our best efforts, children are still not grasping Dewey. How can they when dogs are separated from other animals? Kids don't strategize their searches thinking, hmmm... I bet dogs would be located under applied technology because they are domesticated. And raising pets is probably referred to as animal husbandry. Yeah, that's the ticket... Not!

There is a growing body of academic research pertaining to children and their understanding of categorization. (Trust me, I had to read pretty much all of it for a paper last semester. If you're interested, here is a large portion of my bibliography. Knock yourselves out). Liz Cooper's findings were especially interesting in light of this article, because when children were asked to come up with categories for their own libraries, they came up with suggestions rather similar to those found at a store like Barnes and Noble. So, perhaps it is the library that needs to change, since children's cognition and understanding is a tad harder to mold.

Review: The Golden Compass, film-style

I have to say, the people responsible for The Golden Compass's journey from print to the big screen have their act together loads better than those Potter film folks. Whereas the most recent Harry installment felt more like an outline with crucial quotes instead of a fully fleshed out story, this movie stands on its own, independent of the books. And despite the recent controversy with the church, I feel like they did a great job toeing the delicate boundary between doing the books justice and not being blatantly anti-church. The Magisterium comes across more as a governmental body than anything else. In fact, the only direct reference to it being related to the church was the illustrations on one of their buildings depicting holy bodies. Even then, I was only aware that the figures were holy because of the application of artistic conventions I learned from an Art History course in undergrad. I don't quite see where children will get confused about their faith, but that could just be me.

Now what I don't get about this rendition of The Golden Compass is Dust. They began the movie by stating that the Magisterium banned the topic of Dust and that no one knew about it. And yet when people died, their daemons turned into Dust. While it made the dark battle scene super-duper neat to watch, how the hell do people not realize that there is such a thing as Dust, if daemons spontaneously turned into shimmery particles? In the books, the daemons just disappeared. That was it. Much more ambiguous that way.

Tiny Word, Big Gripe

In my elementary school, we had library special once a week. I can vividly recall one time in particular, standing in line waiting to go to the library in the third grade. There was nothing really out of the ordinary about this day. Hell, I can't even remember what happened once we got to the library. I do, however, remember Mrs. Schwartz giving us an impromptu lesson in the hallway, since we all called the library a lie-berry. She had us annunciate 'library' over and over again until we got it right. From that moment on, it became a personal pet peeve to hear the word lie-berry (Reason number 32 I should have known I was destined to become a librarian).

That being said, I have had to give the same impromptu lesson many a times in my day (though I'm sure they will argue that they have been nagged repeatedly by me. Tomatoes, tom-ah-toes). At this point, I expect it and try to hold my tongue to avoid persecuting my friends and family over a teensy word. I am almost at the point where I don't shudder uncontrollably upon hearing the dreaded mispronunciation of my safe haven. Or at least, I thought I was. All that changed once I was enrolled in a library program and heard FUTURE LIBRARIANS saying lie-berry. !!! Now, I can understand people outside the profession to some degree--said fast, that first 'r' is almost silent. But if you are eating, sleeping and breathing library like so many of us MLIS students have to do in order to pass our courses, that is just unforgivable. I'm sorry. I think that alongside having to take 36 credits in order to graduate, you must also be able to properly pronounce your intended career destination. "Oh, where do you want to work? A lie-berry? I'm sorry, give me that diploma." ::rips said diploma into party confetti, throws it in the abomination of a librarian's face and then jumps up and down upon the little shreds while doing the twist so as to get the pieces good and dirty::

There is one guy in my Human Information Behavior class that makes me wince over and cringe because he blatantly calls it a lie-berry every time. Every time! I've listened closely, done a critical analysis of his intonations, and he distinctly utters 'lie' and then 'berry.' I understand that this is a rather trivial matter in the grand scheme of things. And that it is your people skills and ability to find things and blah blah blah that makes you a good librarian; but if we cannot pronounce the word correctly, how will the patrons ever do it?

A blog by any other name would still not activate my sense of smell

If my blog really were a person, I would hope that his visage would look like that guy (thank you Bloglines for taking the time to revamp your site--I might not have found my new favorite silly old man otherwise). Oh Mr. Blog, if only you were a plumber. Then I can crack jokes about lowrise jeans and thongs--these fashions are very plumber 2.0, after all.

I've also decided that you might forgive my dissonance if I titled you properly. I admit I have gone too long titling you with only my birthday digits. Your original pending title, Kidlit Galaxy, caused me intense claustrophobia. It misled my neurons into jumping synapses that were solely dedicated to children's literature and we both know that I plan on doing much more with you than that. And while we wouldn't want to title you too prematurely, people are starting to read you now. It's not just the two of us here twiddling our thumbs, having a gay ole time talking about Harry Potter. Currently I'm debating Purple Polka. We'll sit on that for a week, okay?